Alyssa (sugarspunsister) wrote,

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I haven't posted cause I haven't really had much going on. I've been working too much, I'm bored, depressed, tired, skint and very lonely. What's the point? You all know all of this already. This is pretty much my general state of being isn't it? Every day I promise myself it'll be different, today I'll get motivated and do all my work, then finish my novels, and get closer to losing weight so then my life will be perfect. Of course every day it isn't and I'm still myself and go to sleep in my big, cold bed alone and fantasize about boys I expect I'll never have. I guess you could say I'm kind of depressed.

Sometimes, in the middle of the day when the sun is out and I'm listening to Bromheads Jacket and I've just had a Starbucks and I'm thinking about smoking some pot, and I'm out and about and I may see the hot teenage boy I like to drool over at Whole Foods and I haven't checked my email in a couple of hours so I can pretend that when I get home it will be filled with loads of emails from hot guys who adore me, people who want to buy badges off me so I'll have money and loads of music websites and/or publishers who want to employ me, sometimes, at those times, for a little while, I feel alright.
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